Newsletter for August 23, 2024

Finding Hope in Hopeless Times

Life can be overwhelming, and sometimes it feels like everything is crashing down around you. Darkness, fear, and loneliness can seem all-consuming. But even in these moments, remember—you are not alone!

Light always conquers darkness, and there are ways to find that light. Here are some tools that have helped me, and I hope they can help you too:

• Pray: Get on your knees and pray!  There’s power in prayer, and humbling yourself this way can change everything.

• Gratitude List: Start small if you need to—maybe just a single word for five things like the sun, air, trees, grass, and a place to sleep. Gratitude is transformative.

• Turn Off the TV: Especially the news. It’s just noise that adds to the chaos. Disconnect and reclaim your peace.

• Music and Movement: Play your favorite music and dance around your house. It’s not only great exercise but a perfect distraction from the stresses of life.

• Feelings Aren’t Facts: Remember, nothing stays the same! Just as the world changes in an instant, so do your feelings. Don’t let them dictate your reality.

• Connect with God: God, the Blessed Mother, and your Guardian Angels are always with you. Acknowledge them and say thank you—it could always be worse.

• Reach Out: Call an old friend or relative. People love hearing from someone they haven’t spoken to in a while, and it will lift both your spirits.

• Read a Book: Escape into a great story. Grab a cozy blanket, a cup of tea, and let your imagination take you to a peaceful place.

• Cook Something New: Try a recipe you’ve always wanted to make. The simple act of cooking can help your worries fade away.

• Believe in Miracles: They happen, and prayer works. Embrace patience and learn to live in the unknown. Don’t assume the worst—positivity can change everything. And remember, you’re not a mind reader or a fortune teller, so hope for the best!

These tools have been very helpful to me, and I hope they offer you the same comfort and strength. Life’s constants—the sun, the moon, and the ocean—will always be there, rising and falling as they always have.

Enjoy your journey; this is the only ride you get.

Wishing you a wonderful day and an even better weekend. I’ll be back next week, sending hope, love, and prayers your way.

XOXO,
Elizabeth aka Bizzy

Newsletter for Friday August 16, 2024

God! 

18 years sober and yes the world has changed in so many ways. One can get sober using a plethora of choices. AA, SmartRecovery, SoberSis, and Recovery Church to name a few. What works??

I believe that having a relationship with your higher power that I call God is of the utmost importance, but how do people find God if so many people don’t believe? We are in a real conundrum.

Today (Thursday) I was in a parking lot pulling out of a space. The parking lot was not full; there were many open spots to park. I started reversing and I heard honking. I looked back and a young man was honking and screaming. I rolled down my window and looked at the guy and said, “God Bless You.” He then screamed, “FU, I don’t believe in God! I am a Pagan!” I said, “Good for You, I still wish you the best.” He then stuck out his middle finger and said,  “It is people like you that make me not believe.” So sad! 

Lately, I have been hearing and seeing more people than ever before scream that they don’t have faith! They don’t go to church, or trust in anything but themselves! 

Now, I am not a Bible beater and I don’t think it is my place to tell people what is right and wrong to believe. But I can tell you from first hand experiences we are living in dark times! 

In fact I think that not having any faith at all could be the most important issue of our times.

We need to count on something.  Having blind faith and knowing you have God watching over you not only brings you calm and peace, it reassures you that you're not facing life alone. 

The disease of addiction is very isolated and lonely. 

The addict is isolated, the family members are in a constant state of worry! It is such a scary disease! And, today the disease is hitting more families than ever.  

One cannot speak with their friends about a family member that is sick with addiction for fear of being judged! 

When one has nowhere else to turn it is so comforting to know you have God. God listens anywhere you are. You can get on your knees in most places and ask for help. The help that you have asked for may not be immediate, but I know I get relief when I ask for help! 

God is there for all of us! We don’t have to battle these tough times alone. 

Knowing you have somewhere to turn is comforting and I conclude that we all could use a little more God and a little less self reliance. I know for me personally I cannot solve my problems alone. I need help from others and starting my day asking for God’s guidance and help throughout the day benefits not only myself but anyone I come in contact with during the day. 

Humility is tough for a lot of us but I promise you being humble will give more gifts than you could ever imagine. 

Try it! Let me know how it works for you. 

Have a wonderful weekend. 

Sending blessings to all that are reading this today. 

XOXO

Elizabeth aka Bizzy 

Newsletter August 9, 2024

reenactment of 4am

Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night?

I don’t know if you ever wake up way before your alarm, at say 4 am, filled with worry; but I have to tell you I do sometimes. I wake up and of course I have to wake up JF (my hubby)...I reach over and touch him and ask in a particularly loud voice, “ Hey, are you up? I really need to talk.” He of course rolls over and asks, “What’s up?” My response is, “I’m worried!”

Now we are both awake and of course it’s pitch black outside and the dogs are still sleeping. The perfect time to talk about my anxiety about the future! 

Can you relate? 

I know that I try to preach that it is so much better to live in gratitude and faith but some days I slip and literally go to “the Dark Side”, as I like to call it. For some reason I wake up out of a dead sleep and my mind is racing… What if this happens? What if that happens? What is our plan? Do we have a plan B? “What if’s” just bouncing around my brain and it drives me crazy! 

So rather than dealing with them myself, I of course need to bring my husband along for the ride! He doesn’t know what to say, he’s asleep! But I ramble on and on about what is going to happen if we don’t do this and if we don’t do that! It goes on for 20 minutes and then I get a little angry (ok I get a lot angry) that he doesn’t have a plan! He doesn’t have a McGiveresqe plan B for us! 

It is dark my friends. To be honest I hate with all of my heart going to the dark side! But I am human and it honestly happens!

By the time we are finished with Doomsday and I have gotten really mad at my lovely husband it is 5:30! His alarm is now going off and as they used to say, “It is time to make the donuts!” LOL! He’s ready to go! In fact, he is out the door in record time! I think he is like, “Get me out of here, this lady I’m married to is nuts!” 

Btw I totally get it! I do get nuts! Yes, I am less than a week shy of having 18 years of continuous sobriety but that does not mean that I am not human and that at times I do go back to old behaviors especially when I am feeling scared; FEAR. 

He leaves and I get my warm water and it is time for me to get with God! I start my morning routine of listening to the Hallow App. It is literally a life saver. I sit with my warm water and my dogs and I pray. It is the absolutely best way to start the day! Not the way I started today in the dark! But I restarted my day and it was a total game changer! No more dark my friends. I got into the light, with God and the Blessed Mother! 

It is so nice to know that I can restart my day at any time. 

Having tools that benefit you and your mental health are as important as physical exercise. 

We are living in uncertain times and prayer, meditation, quiet, lighting a candle, getting on my knees and praying are so beneficial to how my day goes. 

If I didn’t have those tools I would have been a babbling idiot all day! 

I would have shared with my friends and family my drama! Telling them stories about what hasn’t happened yet! I would have gotten them all riled up and for what? Because misery loves company? 

Needless to say I don’t have to drag a bunch of people into my insanity anymore! I have learned tools and you can too! 

And to bring back my optimistic self, I want you to know that I pray none of those crazy stories I was telling my husband at 4 am ever come to life. 

I know prayer works and I know God is listening… he has shown me time and time again that he listens. His timing might not be my timing but in the end everything always ends up better than I could ever imagine. 

That being said I hope you and your families have an absolutely fantastic weekend. 

Sending big hugs and love. 

XOXO 

Elizabeth aka Bizzy 

Newsletter for August 2, 2024

Friendship

How often do friendships change? I believe it happens a lot. Friends come and go. Some come for a season and leave for a reason. It is so important to be kind to yourself and realize that during growth we need to adjust as we get older, we transform and when we change our friendships change too! They look different and feel different. It’s not all bad. It just is.

When I got sober, I had friends when I needed them. But, a lot of friends just disappeared. 

It’s kind of like when you get divorced. 

Prior to getting divorced I had a lot of married friends. I had spent holidays and other occasions with these people. They were like family. Then they all disappeared. They ran away like they were scared. It felt like they thought they could catch it. Like it was a disease! 

Just like alcoholism. When I told some friends I had quit drinking they dropped me like a hot potato! 

Real friendships are hard to come by. I remember when I was little my mom would tell me, “Elizabeth if you have a handful of friends before you die you’re a very blessed person”  she was right. 100%  correct. She knew what she was talking about. 

By the way, this is what we get from history. We learn from our elders. We get to hear from older people. We get to hear from different people about history and their past experiences. My mom warned me a long time ago, you don’t need all these friends, Elizabeth.  You just need solid friends, real friends and I can honestly say today I have a handful of friends that would be there in a heartbeat!

Although, I also have a lot of acquaintances to which I feel blessed. But real friends that will show up no matter what it’s like a humongous gift! They are the  friends that will pick you up if you have a flat tire on the highway or on a back road. You know that if you call this friend they will show up!  That’s a true friend. A friend that doesn’t gossip about you to other people that’s a true friend, a friend that doesn’t judge you, a friend that doesn’t make you feel badly about yourself is a true friend. A dear friend will also tell you when they are worried about you, these real friends will call BS when you need to hear it. 

I have a couple of these friends and I feel very blessed. But, I’ve met women that I pray I never see again! They were not nice people and just because they say that they are something and in a program does not mean that they’re nice or that they’re authentic. They may look pretty on the outside but on the inside they’re yucky

I went through times with these tough people and I pray again,that I never have to see any of them again. I was raised in Missouri, the midwest, it wasn’t only Apple pie and the Cardinals,  it was a belief that you loved your neighbors. Everyone said hello to everyone. ( BTW I still do say hi to everyone and my husband thinks I’m crazy LOL) 

I was totally naïve when I moved to the East Coast. I tried to be friends with everyone. The reality is not everyone likes me and I don’t like all people. I have learned that I have to protect my heart. This took me decades to learn after a lot of heartache and realized the steel wall around my heart. I don’t want that anymore. I wanna have true authentic friendships. It’s so interesting in today’s climate. So many “friends” are very wishy-washy about what they want and what they don’t want.  They’re afraid of what you’re gonna think over what they believe in their hearts. It’s like what your friend thinks trumps what you think? I want people that are going to be grounded and rooted in what their beliefs are. They aren’t wishy-washy; they know what is right and what is wrong instead of being like well I think this, well I think that, or it’s OK everybody can be whatever they want to be. No, that’s not the truth, not everybody can be what they wanna be, people need to be God-fearing in some form. 

I understand we all change our beliefs over time. We all go from a place of I believe this to a place I believe that and I think that that comes with growth. The older we get the wiser we are.If you stay grounded with God, you know what is right. You know in your heart what is right. It may not be what your neighbor may believe in, it might not be what your friend believes but it’s what you believe! You need to be true to yourself.  

I think right now we have so little respect for God. The Olympics was just one example of that. They mocked Christianity! We need to stand up for our beliefs hence why I am going out these days and speaking my truth. 

I’ve always been a person that’s watched the news and I’ve been around politics my entire life and I have firm beliefs. They are not wishy-washy. I understand why people don’t like Donald Trump, people think he’s mean.  I would rather have a leader that is strong and not always nice as my leader. He hasn’t rewritten history. In fact he believes in American history and what our forefathers stood for. I do wish that he was a little kinder with his words. The words that he uses sometimes come off harsh and he can be crass. 

I believe that he is the only person that can fight what’s going on in this world. Kamala Harris cannot go against Putin. She cannot go against Kim Jung Yun . She can’t go against any foreign leader. All she does is cackle. All she’s done is literally slept her way to the top, that’s the truth! I believe that a woman could be an amazing leader, but not this woman! 

And my friends that are so wishy-washy and have no beliefs and have no God are gonna vote for her because she’s Indian, Jamaican and she’s a woman!  I believe she's gonna run the United States of America into the ground! She’s  already taken us to a place that I don’t recognize with President Joe Biden!  

Donald Trump in my opinion is an amazing leader and when he was president, we can’t deny that we were all sitting in our homes with more money in our pockets. I felt safe. There were no wars going on in the world. 

I don’t feel safe today, and I told a friend the other day I said you realize that there are Chinese and Russian planes flying into Alaska airspace. She responded,  “whatever that doesn’t even count”! Yes it does count, I told her!  The countries that hate America are coming for us! . If we have Kamala Harris in office and they’re gonna take us over and we’re sitting ducks!

So as your friend I am telling you it is time to get honest, speak up! If your friends don’t agree well, so be it! Own who you are and what’s important to you! Don’t let anyone take away your freedom of speech and the freedom to be who you are, believe what you believe and stand tall! 

Life is better when you can look in the mirror and like what is staring back at you than to live a life filled with friends that really don’t care about you! 

Until next week, take care, be safe! 

Sending hugs and love to you all. 

XO 

Elizabeth aka Bizzy

Newsletter for July 26, 2024

Recovering

Happy Friday, I am sitting here trying to rest because I just had an epidural in my back. Please help me pray that it works and that I am finally out of pain.

Last night I watched President Biden’s last speech from the Oval office. It was short but one thing he said, that I can’t stop thinking about, was this sentence:

“On those rare moments in history, when the decisions we make now determine the fate of our nation and the world for decades to come, America is going to have to choose between moving forward or backward, between hope and hate, between unity and division.”

What does this sentence mean to you? It left me in complete contemplation.

Life for the past 4 years has been challenging to say the least. Men wanting to become women, women wanting to become men. Anheuser-Busch having a commercial with a man dressed as a woman putting down men who are hard workers and good ole boys resulting in a company that I loved as a child becoming a company that I would never buy anything from again.

Not to mention black lives matter and George Floyd. People going out and burning our cities down to the ground. Destroying Mom and Pop stores to the point that they could never recover.

In the past four years the fact that a campaign to defund the police was supported by members of the country was shocking! Today one can steal up to $1000 in certain cities and the person stealing will not be prosecuted. Instead they get carte blanche with no repercussions.

Our borders are open and whomever wants to come over can! No one has been vetted or investigated! Come on over! In America we will give you money, put you up at a nice hotel and let you do whatever in the world you want to do here.

Lastly, I have to mention fentanyl!  The cartels are running the show. I believe this is global terrorism. If you watched the RNC convention and heard the Mother of 5 talk about her oldest son who had never done drugs, and he tried it once! It was laced with fentanyl and her child died!

More Americans have died from fentanyl overdoses than died in World War II!

Hmmm, back to part of the statement President Joe Biden made, “America is going to have to choose between moving forward or backward,”

Prior to the 46th president taking office our country was not perfect. NO it wasn’t but there was some sense of law and order. God was still a big part of people's lives in the 70’s and 80’s. What happened? Jerry Seinfeld just spoke about this, he said in the 70’s and 80’s if you had a job and could support your family that was enough. You had a good life. And, then the 90’s it became all about the money! Money became people's God.

During Covid people got locked in their homes with no sense of community and couldn’t be with their loved ones. In fact people were in isolation. I know that when prisoners in jail get in trouble their punishment is to be put in isolation!

Human beings need each other to exist and have healthy lives. We need our families and our friends; we need to worship! We need to have a relationship with God and the socialization of being with people that believe what we believe. We need to support one another in good times and bad. We need love! We need companionship, we don't need to be isolated.

So do I want to continue with life as it is today? Do I want more government, more darkness? More insanity pushed my way with the woke media? Absolutely NOT! I don’t want to continue the way we have been going these past 4 years. I can’t handle the insanity, enough is enough- the pendulum has swung too far.

I want a president who is going to help straighten out what has transpired the past four years. I want the world to know that we are America and we are strong and we are united as a country! I want to see the American Flag again from my neighbors homes. I want us to come together under one country with liberty and justice for all.

So, sorry Joe Biden. I don’t want a future that is filled with more woke agendas. I want God to be brought back into our lives. I want people to have hope and a love for a country they call home.

I know I may sound naive and idealistic but I believe that we can get back to the basics of family, friends, faith and our flag.

God bless you and our Country!

Sending big hugs and love to you all.

XO

Elizabeth

Newsletter for July 11, 2024

Midsummer

Happy Friday, the fourth of July has passed and the heat is here. I am sitting here in not so sunny South Florida relaxing, it is ironic because I keep thinking of my childhood when it was hot in St. Louis and how we just sat on the couch and watched TV. When my Mom would tell us we needed to get out of the house we biked, swam and played tennis. We didn’t have a schedule…we just truly were couch potatoes. 

I think back to those times fondly. Life was easy, we had done a year's worth of school and it was time to just hang. 

Today being an empty-nester and living in an area that literally becomes a ghost town in the summer is forcing me to chill! Relaxing isn’t always easy for me. I think that if I am not busy that something is wrong. I have friends call and ask; “What are you up to?” and my response is “Not much LOL”. I don’t have any fires or drama. It’s quiet. 

Being quiet today I realize can be uncomfortable, but I want to change that! I want to view my life differently. 

In AA I was introduced to the concept that we are exactly where we are supposed to be. God has a plan for me. Why fight it? 

Because of society? Because of all of the noise?

Surrendering is hard! But fighting the feelings is even harder. 

I know that God is truly in charge! It is my job to get right with him! And a bonus in my life after my trip to Medjorgia is that I also ask the Blessed Mother Mary to be with me as well. I ask for their help. I can’t manage on my own but knowing that I have God and the Blessed Mother with me I know that I am OK, even better than OK! I trust that they have my best interest at heart and I can let go….

Getting to this place where I can truly rely and trust God has been recent. For years I stayed in fear, resentment and a sense of uncertainty. I questioned if this is all that life has to offer…ugh! Why? Why? Why? I regretted the past and constantly wished things were different.  

I finally surrendered! It took a lot of pain to finally give up my will and know that God’s plan has to be better than mine. I had to let go..

Today I am embracing this time of quiet. I trust that everything is exactly the way it is supposed to be. Even the things that are unpleasant in my life. Nothing going on in my life is by mistake. I need to embrace this time because let’s face it, nothing stays the same. 

Everything is constantly changing… 

Have a wonderful weekend. 

Sending big hugs and love to you all. 

XOXO 

Elizabeth aka Bizzy 

Newsletter for July 5, 2024

Everything Changes…

Happy Independence Day!!

Unfortunately I went to the trainer and Pilates and thought for some reason that I could push myself and nothing would happen. But I was wrong…I have been lying on the couch for days in so much pain. Getting older for some of us isn’t easy. In fact I think working out should be a four letter word!!! HAHAHA

Sitting around and not running from here to there has given me a lot of time to think, reminisce, and ponder. 

I thought back to when I was a child, a teen, pre-children, post children. Wow! Nothing has been consistent. I know that a lot of people have traditions and that is so incredible. We all long for something we don’t have…and today I long for traditions and family. 

This year we stayed home and watched whatever fireworks that were being set off in our neighborhood. My back was causing me a lot of pain and my dogs were very upset with all of the banging around us. So I sat and sat and sat! 

It is truly the little things that make life so special. 

We watched two old movies on the 4th. Dave with Kevin Kline and The American President with Michael Douglas. They are both great movies in my opinion. But, as I realized after both movies, life has changed so much! I mean in some ways it is unrecognizable. I mean they are movies but it seemed like it was a lighter time and that there was joy and laughter and not much criticism for others. I can’t even imagine if they made a movie like that today. Every one would find some reason to find the movie offensive. We are living in the darkest times in my opinion. But, I never lived during WWII or The Great Depression. 

Lightness is something that I have always been able to attain, especially after putting down the drink. But, I think maybe naively, that life was a little easier pre-cellphones and social media. We have constant noise and fear mongering around us which of course conjures up anxiety and a sense that we aren’t safe. No wonder so many people are turning to drugs and alcohol. 

On a bright note I think a lot of people are also leaning into being sober today. I have seen so many changes in my almost 18 years of continuous sobriety. New drinks that do not have alcohol are on the market and we have so many more choices today when going out. We can order a fabulous mocktail and feel just as festive as the others at the restaurant or event. 

Everything is evolving, including me. I have learned so much on my journey so far and I look forward to learning more. 

When one is awake and aware we have choices. My choice to not drink was probably when my life completely pivoted. Things that I thought were important fell to the wayside. My palette in life changed and is ever evolving. The key I believe is that when I get down and have a pity party, I have to always remember that my past is behind me and I can’t go back…all I can do is enjoy the moment and know that this day too will fade into my journey. 

I don’t hold on to anything physical; the only thing I want to hold onto is the light, God, the Blessed Mother, my faith, my hope and my sobriety. 

Have a wonderful weekend.

Until next time keep getting busy sober. 

Love

Elizabeth aka Bizzy ,

Newsletter for June 28, 2024

God Bless America 

Happy Friday everyone! 

I bet a lot of you are getting ready for next week and the 4th of July! Growing up I always loved the excitement that surrounds the 4th, the parades, barbecue, and fireworks. 

In St. Louis we would go and watch the amazing display under the Arch! It was absolutely mesmerizing as a child…it was AWESOME! 

Wow I haven’t thought of this in a while but when I went to college in DC I would stay in for the Summer and not go home. One Summer in 1991 I was asked if I would volunteer for the big 4th of July celebration. Of course I said yes!

Little did I know that this year in particular they were having a special event recognizing the fallen soldiers of Desert Storm. 

Now I was young back then and I had no idea how emotional it was going to be! When I arrived the morning of the 4th there were so many buses! Bus after bus filled with family members that had lost their child, their nephew, their husband, their Dad and I could go on and on! These human beings had enlisted in the military to fight for our Country! 

Young people that were sent to fight horrendous a war that was occuring in the middle east. Some place these young men and women never in their wildest dreams ever thought they would experience. It was a scary and foreign place filled with death and darkness. 

The reason I know these things is that I had Veteran and Chaplain Michael Le Buhn on the show this week and he talked all about the tragedies that he saw. The episode will be dropped Monday morning at 6am est. 

I think time is an amazing tool in that it helps us to forget but after last night's debate it all came rushing back this morning. 

We are a nation that had so much honor and loyalty! Growing up people celebrated being an American! Every home had an American Flag hanging outside. We all loved being patriotic! Singing the Star Spangled Banner! Now of course I was raised in the midwest, it was America! Apple pie, baseball games and a real love of our country! 

I think back to when I was young and I have so many fond memories! But, that is where they are in my past. 

Today, it is so sad where we are as a nation. On the street I live on in Florida hardly anyone has a flag hanging from their home and people are ashamed…Hanging a flag means your one political party not one nation under God as it was when I was growing up….

After watching the debate last night I was sad. To think that Joe Biden’s wife would let him go on stage in front of the entire country when he obviously is having some real health and cognitive issues is just terrible. I really can’t share in words how bad that is! I mean what is going on? Does she hate him? And, he is the leader of the free world? I don’t think so. 

Who is running our Country? 

I don’t know if we will ever know the answer to that question. But I know one thing: I want my Country back! I want the United States of America that I grew up with back!

On a bright note, I truly believe that President Donald Trump looked so Presidential last night and I am so proud to be voting for him the third time. It is my hope that he can make America Great Again.

We are days away from the celebration of the signing of the Declaration of  Independence ,the day we became an independent nation in 1776. 

I want to wish all of you a very Happy 4th of July! Please hang your flag and think back to the simple times and love your nation, be proud and let's work together to get America back to where it was. 

Sending big love and hugs

XO 

Bizzy 

Newsletter June 21, 2024

Grow up! 

Ugh! Who wants to grow up? No one…let’s be a “Toys R Us” kid forever, (even though the store doesn’t exist anymore hahaha. I love the Jingle). 

I remember having three children and being overwhelmed…all I wanted was to get to the evening and put the kids to bed and have a glass of wine. That was when I could relax…ahhh I am done! But, I never had one glass of wine and I was never done. 

Sitting here writing this I know I am still not done, there is laundry in the washer and dishes in the sink…we are never done. 

My big question to myself is why do I want to be done? Why don’t I want to take responsibility for myself and get my stuff done? Because I want to be lazy instead! Sit and watch mindless television and just think of nothing…

Unfortunately I don't think this is what we were made to do; sit and just be bumps on a log. I think we need to educate ourselves, better ourselves and enjoy life even when it is a little more challenging. 

The good news is everything is always changing. When my children were young I wanted them to be old and now that they are old I want them to be young. See I have to grow up! 

Growing up can be painful at times. 

When I was young I would kick, scream and stomp my feet when I didn’t get my way. I no longer do those things and I have learned that now my children do what they want and most times that doesn’t include me and I have to be ok with that. They are grown-up! 

Making choices and decisions is a part of being an adult and it seems like today in the environment we live in it is ok to be wishy-washy and really not have an opinion. We need to make everyone happy! Everyone wins a trophy, everything is instantaneous gratification and you get what you want when you want it! You make choices given who the popular people are, you change your looks and sometimes your beliefs so that you fit in! 

It takes a lot of chutzpah and guts to stand up for what you believe in today. 

For instance, when your child wants something and you don’t want them to have it but you feel badly you still have to be a grown up and say NO! 

Another example is Justin Timberlake driving his car while intoxicated. Was that a grown up decision? I think not! He has enough money to call an Uber or probably any limo service and have them pick him up! But no, he got behind the wheel and thank God no one was hurt. He didn’t make a grown up decision! 

Being a grown up is not always fun. In fact it can be overrated but is there an alternative? I think not!

So rather than saying yes when you mean NO, it is time to own you! It is time to grow up! 

Have wonderful weekend sending big hugs

XO 

Elizabeth 

Newsletter for June 14, 2024

In 2024 it is hard to feed the light when there is so much darkness around us. But, when I was on my pilgrimage, one of the many lessons I learned was that fear is a sin. You cannot have faith while you are living in fear.

One of my favorite lines in the book Alcoholics Anonymous is “Faith without works is dead”!

So it is unanimous that if we have fear we can’t live in the light! Anxiety, the new (well maybe not so new) buzzword is a new way of saying, “I am scared.”

This week I met a man who is completely in his addiction. He kept repeating to me how he has so much anxiety. It was as if that feeling of anxiety was an excuse for drinking and drugging. He was scared and he has no other tools other than to manipulate and tell everyone how he is riddled with anxiety.

My response was, “Anxiety is just a word for fear, you are scared!”

We all have felt fear since Covid. We were all locked in our homes and had to clean our groceries before they came into our homes in fear that we may contract the disease through our food. It was insane! The media just filled all our homes with nonstop stories of how we were all going to die if we didn’t mask up and we didn’t sanitize everything!

63% of Americans claim to be Christian! Don’t we learn in the church that when we die we will go to heaven (if we were good people)? Do people believe that they are bad and they aren’t going to heaven?  Or is it that no one really believes what they hear in church? Or is it that the media and government won? 

I know this: the powers that be, ie. the government and media, sure were louder than your faith! The darkness took over! There was barely any light…we couldn’t meet in church and hear faith from our priests…no wonder the dark took over. 

These days I have to go to my faith first thing in the morning, before my feet touch the ground. I have to make a conscious effort to acknowledge that today is a new day, yesterday is gone and tomorrow isn’t here yet. Thank God for today! I listen to the Hallow App for some divine inspiration to get my day started. When I do that I start my day in the light of God and not the fear that comes out of the television and radio.

We have the choice to feed the light or the dark!

Another story I have is from the local dry cleaner. The owner, who is the most lovely woman, had a stroke. She is alive and on the mend but while she is in the hospital her daughter is running her store. I went in today to pick something up and the owner's daughter was distraught. Her Mom who she loves with all of her heart is sick and she couldn’t get out of the funk! We all have been there…

I said you need to focus on the light, your Mom is still here and presently at physical therapy. She is on the mend! You need to focus on the light and not the dark! She looked at me and said, “Oh my gosh, you are so right.”

The darkness pulls us all in at times and our job is to keep it at bay! Practice writing a gratitude list, remember all that really is good in the world and if you can’t find anything that is good then fake it!

I learned in meetings years ago that you fake it till you make it! How many fake being happy and joyous even when inside they are feeling terrible?  But I think just by faking it we change. A smile on your face can change everything. If you hold the door open for someone and watch the person's face, you see it light up! At least most of the time LOL.

When we get out of the way and help another person everything changes! I know when I help another I am no longer focused on me! I am focused on the person that I am helping.

Reach out today and help someone else.

Remember that the light is stronger than the dark!

One way I stay in the light is by wearing bright clothing! I swear it helps me start my day on the right foot. If I wear dark colors I feel a little drab!

So go put on your colorful or white outfit and if you don’t feel better instantly give it time and try faking it!

Have a wonderful weekend!

By the way if you haven’t joined my Patreon account I would be beyond grateful if you did. Here is the link: 

Patreon:https://patreon.com/busylivingsoberpodcast?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLink

Also, I am starting to go LIVE on Monday’s starting July 1st at Noon est on Instagram. 

Until next time, have a happy, happy. 

XO 

Elizabeth aka Bizzy

Newsletter for June 7th, 2024

I have been watching a lot of podcasts lately. Shawn Ryan’s interviews with Tucker Carlson and Jordan Peterson I loved and learned so much. And Tucker’s interview with the President of El Salvador, Nayib Bukele, was incredible! 

What I found so interesting from these three men was that God was the most important thing to all of them. All three gave God the credit for where they are today. God is everything to them! 

In the Bible it says

Matthew 19:26

“Jesus looked at them and said, ‘With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.’”

In AA from the book Alcoholics Anonymous, page 53 

“When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is, or He isn't. What was our choice to be? I heard that either “God is everything or he is nothing”

When we make the decision to rely on ourselves or other people to cure us or make us happy, we ourselves and the other people fall short! We are human! We make mistakes….

These days I am finding it more and more interesting how true it is that we can’t rely completely on any person! All humans are fallible.  

For example as you all know I am a conservative Catholic woman and I just started going back to the Catholic Church and priests are not all the same and do not all believe the same things. Naively I thought that they did, I thought that every Catholic priest was conservative and believed that our Pope was kind off his rocker! But, I was WRONG!!!!

Here is an example of this: I met a friar when I was in Medjugorje and he is from Florida. I thought meeting this man of God was a sign that YES I am on the right path! He is from my area in South Florida and I met him thousands of miles away from home in Bosnia. Is this ironic or a God wink? I of course thought it was a sign from God! 

I was over the moon!!!!I had a sign!!! I was so excited! I got the Friars number and made a plan to meet in Florida.

BTW was I wrong in that all priests had the same beliefs, in fact quite the contrary! 

When meeting the friar again here in Florida I learned that he has completely opposite views than I have! He was adamant about his stance! We sat on opposite sides of the aisle! 

Now did that make me run away again from the Catholic Church? No it did not because in reality God is not about the building or the person giving the sermon. It is about believing in God and trusting that God has control, not any human standing in front of you professing something that you know in your heart not to be true! 

God gives human beings the ability to make choices! 

I can only judge what is good for me and what is bad for me. That may be different than what another believes but I have to go with what works for me at my core! It isn’t my job to make others happy or convince people to believe the same way I do….but it is my job to be honest with myself! At times this is difficult because there is so much noise! 

My belief is that we all have to decipher what is right and wrong in our hearts and be true to that! As my son Henry always says, “You do you boo boo”. 

Find your path and what works for you and hold that sacred! 

Know that God loves you no matter what and that you are never alone. 

Keep getting busy living sober! 

Have a great weekend

XO

Elizabeth 

Newsletter for May 31st, 2024

Miracles are everywhere if you can be open to them. 

I went to an AA meeting yesterday and it had been a while since I was at an actual in-person meeting. The last one I went to was in Bosnia so it had been 3 weeks, I would never recommend going this long but I did…Like everything I can fault the humans attending. 98% of the time I leave a meeting I feel amazing and one of those days was yesterday. 

Now this AA meeting wasn’t anything special on the outside, and the day wasn’t that out of the ordinary…it was sunny and warm. The building where I attended the meeting was a little beaten up, it needs a fresh coat of paint and the bathrooms really need to be cleaned but going to an AA meeting is not about aesthetics, it is all about the magic you feel when you are in a room of strangers talking about how transformed your life has been since putting down the drink/drug once and for all. 

This was the first time that I saw someone get a chip (what they give out to mark annual anniversaries, milestones in AA) for having 50 years of continuous sobriety!!! 50 years, I mean I was 5 when this person got sober. They were 21! Once the person decided that they were done that was it! No relapses, just everyday waking up saying “I’m not going to drink today”. 

But, I believe from the bottom of my soul that God has a huge part in someone’s sobriety! I know that the afternoon that I fell to my knees in the hot sand of the Jersey shore, and prayed like I have never prayed, begging God to help me ... .I was so desperate! All I wanted was to not hurt anymore from alcohol. I had asked many times before. When I woke up in the morning after a big night of partying and saying “God please…I can’t do this anymore” but that didn’t stick. It was when I actually got on my knees and said, “God help me” that he did. I had to get humble. 

What is humble? 

Webster’s Dictionary definitions of humble is:

• : not proud or haughty : not arrogant or assertive

• : reflecting, expressing, or offered in a spirit of deference or submission

• a humble apology

• : ranking low in a hierarchy or scale : INSIGNIFICANT, UNPRETENTIOUS

• b

• : not costly or luxurious

• a humble contraption

For me personally I think that being humble is the ability to look at yourself and accept who you are, the bumps, lumps, lines, scars, sins and all. When you look in the mirror to accept who you are. I believe that God created us all and we need to embrace ourselves. Love ourselves. No one is perfect! 

Thinking that if you change this or that about yourself will then immediately give you self esteem and self acceptance is kind of ludacris in my mind. I believe that whoever we are we have to love ourselves the way God made us. I know if a plastic surgeon is reading this they think that I am wrong! Go under the knife and a doctor will make you perfect. What if you are already perfect? Plastic surgeons will go out of business?? LOL 

Getting to the place where we love ourselves takes a lot of work! A lot of praying! A lot of quiet! A lot of acceptance! 

One of my most favorite prayers in AA is the Acceptance Prayer: 

Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation- some fact of my life- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept my life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.

This Prayer helped me countless times on my journey. Whenever I was feeling fearful, lost, ashamed, powerless, I would pull out the book of Alcoholics Anonymous and go to page 417 (of the fourth edition) and read the Acceptance Prayer and right away I would feel better. Crazy that reading a prayer and praying can bring you so much peace. 

I believe that when I pray that God is listening and he loves me (and you for that matter) more than I could ever imagine. Humans are the ones that are sometimes scary and mean. God is not mean. 

Jordan Peterson was just on a Reel on Instagram and spoke about getting sober and he said that one must have a Spiritual connection “No treatment centers work, but people do quit. The most reliable cure is a religious transformation.” For me, I am not so sure about the transformation but when I entered AA, my relationship with God changed. I always have loved God and even given him credit for everything in my life, but did I see and feel him the way I have since getting sober, no. 

Today, I can see the magic of God everywhere I go and most especially when I am in the rooms of AA. In the rooms you can see people transform in front of your eyes. They come into a meeting looking lost and sad and give or take 90 days and in that time you see a sad person become happy, you see the person's eyes go from being shallow to bright and filled with hope and faith! It is an absolute miracle! 

You may have had a different experience personally. You may not have ever felt free or watch a loved one finally put down the drink for good but don’t ever lose hope or faith. 

I remember when I got sober in 2006 and my kids' dad was still drinking and he was drinking a lot. My anger towards him was over the top! Everytime I thought of him I got enraged! I would call my sponsor (my fellow traveler in the rooms of AA) and tell her everything that was going on about him. How he was doing this and that. She would listen patiently…I could have gone on for hours (she is a Saint). Finally when I would be finished ranting she would say, “now Elizabeth go and pray for him.” I thought this woman was MAD!!!! “Pray for my drunk ex-husband, it’s never going to happen.” She said, “you want to get better – go pray for him”....

When I asked a woman to sponsor me for some reason I listened to everything she said! I took my marching orders…stomping my feet but in the end I decided ok! “I’ll pray for him”!

I prayed and prayed for him! 

7 years of praying and one day my kids’ dad called me as he was about to be arrested for drinking and driving. Yes, he called me, his ex-sober wife! Crazy right! And, they say miracles don’t happen and prayer doesn’t work! 

Today he has over 10 years of continuous sobriety! 

So never give up hope!

While you are alive and breathing you can pray and it may not be on your time schedule but, I know God is listening! Don’t ever give up! 

Hope you have a stupendous weekend and week and until next time keep getting busy living sober. 

XO 

Elizabeth aka Bizzy 

Newsletter for Friday May 24th, 2024

Authenticity, Transparency and No More Self Doubt

I woke up after recording Wednesday’s podcast with self doubt. My doubt was in my transparency and authenticity. When I record my podcasts I pray, I ask God and The Blessed Mother to speak through me and what comes through me is raw and authentic. I share from my heart and afterwards I question, “should I have said that?”

Do you ever feel that way? 

Do you question what you believe? 

I want to change! I want to embrace who I am and what I believe. 

Prior to going on my pilgrimage, I would never have thought that prayer and saying the rosary would give me so much peace, but it has. It has given me the strength to be my authentic self. Embracing that peace and knowing in my heart that what I may say may offend others or some may not agree is OK! When we are born, we are given the ability to choose and make decisions that are true for us, in our best interest and others may not agree and may be angered by our choice and that is fine! The truth is if we are honest and coming from a place of love then if we offend we can just say, “I am sorry I offended you but, this is my truth!”

In my opinion, these times of late have brought so much anxiety and unrest because I feel that society or at the least what the media portrays is that we all must think and act the same. We all must embrace this WOKE culture and accept things that we know in our hearts aren’t true. For example, the they/them, he/her pronouns. When did the sex we were born become such a hot topic? I believe it isn’t that complicated! Either you are a girl or a boy. It is one or the other. Society wants us to believe that it is an individual's decision and if you don’t like what you were born into, you can change it! I think that is just insane! 

When I was in Medjugorje and I spoke to the young people there about the US vs Bosnia Herzegovina the first thing they said was, “if someone in our Country tried to teach our children about a WOKE narrative we would shoot them”! I asked why do you think that it is happening in the US and they said without question, “Mental Illness!”

Today we keep our mouths shut and opinions to ourselves so that we don’t offend. We stay quiet and only speak to a small group that we know that we can be honest with. Fear of being judged as racist or simple-minded trumps being and saying what we know in our hearts to be true. 

It is funny, lately on my podcast I have been very forthright about being Catholic, loving God and being a Patriot. I support Donald Trump and with that I received many emails from listeners thanking me for being honest, thanking me for being strong! They say that I am courageous and fearless. Is that true? 

I don’t think that I am necessarily all of those adjectives, but I do know that I have strong beliefs and I know what I believe to be true. I can accept that I see things as right and wrong. I don’t and I am not wishy washy in what I believe at my core. This set of core beliefs were instilled in me at a very young age. As a family growing up it was not a choice whether or not we went to church! No excuse (besides being ill) would be accepted, you went to church Sunday mornings whether you liked it or not. Today, looking back, that is where I learned right from wrong. That is where I learned the 10 commandments and that God died for us. 

When I hit my teenage years I made choices now looking back were not always in my best interest. I chose not to go to Church anymore and I put all of those core beliefs in the back of my mind and chose to go and experiment! That is when I started drinking, became an alcoholic (I kind of believe I was born this way, I always had the alcoholic gene, and it wasn’t until I drank too much that the gene was triggered. Once you become a pickle you can’t be a cucumber again) and made choices that got me in trouble and brought on more regrets and shame than I could have ever expected. 

Today being sober and back to where I was when I was a child is a gift that I cherish more than money or words could ever express. God loves me (he loves you too) and he has given me this gift to be honest and authentic no matter what the cost. 

Friendships and followers have changed, some have decided to unsubscribe or have deleted my number and my social media accounts but that is the price I am willing to pay to be true to myself and to God. Life is about making choices and for many years I did things to make others like me and today I am who I am and voice who I am knowing that I am GOOD! I can sleep at night knowing that I spoke my truth! I ask God to speak through me and if it offends then so be it. 

My prayer for you reading this is that you have the courage to speak up and be your authentic self because God made you exactly the way you are. Don’t ever be ashamed of yourself if you are speaking from your heart, your core. Your beliefs are yours and they aren’t wrong even if they are different from mine. 

I respect others and love everyone even if I don’t want to break bread with everyone I love from my heart. 

Have a wonderful Memorial Day weekend and if you could take some time to acknowledge the fallen soldiers that died for our freedoms (what are left of them) that would be lovely. Memorial Day of late has been about sales at department stores and the barbecue and not about what this day represents and that is our ability to vote, pray to whatever God we want and to speak our truths! 

God Bless America! 

Have a wonderful holiday and keep getting busy living sober. 

XO

Elizabeth Chance 

Newsletter for May 17, 2024

Why me?

Do you ever think that? 

Why is this happening to me? Why do I have this horrible problem? Why am I experiencing this? Why, why, why? 

I have had this feeling countless times in my life. Why was I born to this family? Why isn’t my son talking to me? Why are some of my children having to face the problems that they are facing? 

Today for the first time I had an explanation! One that actually made sense. 

We all have to endure life and its challenges because we learn from them, and they prepare us for things that may happen in the future. 

Remember that saying, “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” 

I believe that today. 

Can life be hard and challenging? Yes! There is no question it is hard at times. But, if we didn’t have the challenges we wouldn’t know what peace and serenity were. 

Today I was listening to the Hallow app and the story of the Blessed Mother Mary. Mary was a regular girl but, it now is believed, and maybe was alway believed, that Mary was put on this Earth and born to her mother by the Divine. She didn’t always have it easy, can you imagine becoming pregnant after never having sex! That would be unfathomable. One would be questioning like crazy but she was! Mary was pregnant and gave birth to Jesus. I am sure she thought to herself, why me! Why was I chosen???

We all go through things that challenge us and make us think why me…. 

I believe that we all brave things that we question but if we can think to ourselves that there is a reason and we might not know right now the reason why we can trust that it is part of our Father’s divine plan. 

We all get to make choices and have free will. It is our decisions that lead us to where we presently are in our lives. Some decisions in the moments we think are the best idea and soon later find out we were wrong. But, we don’t have to question. We just have to trust that we are where we are for a reason. It is time to take this opportunity to grow and change. We can’t let it kill us. 

Drugs and alcohol made my life bearable. It made the why so much easier in the moments. I could live! I could go on. In a way alcohol saved me, but it also stole from me. It stole my heart and my soul. I was in so much pain, I needed something to quell that pain and alcohol did the trick till it didn’t anymore. When I put down that last drink in August of 2006 I had to face the why and figure out a new way to cope. I went to 12 Step meetings and talked…I let things that had been built up inside go…I found my person that listened and didn’t judge me. I could be honest! 

We all get to be honest today and say yes, this isn’t fair and this is really uncomfortable but I can endure. I can go on. In fact, we get to look at the why and say why not me? I get to feel these feelings and be challenged because this challenge is going to make me stronger, wiser and able to actually help others that may go through the same experience. 

Listening this morning to The Blessed Mother’s story but also Mary Magdalene's story, I felt a real peace. They both were challenged and they came out the wiser and examples for us today to be able to relate and know in our hearts that we can and will get through anything.

As I am writing this, I see my rosary, and think back to just 2 months ago and the thought that I would ever be saying the rosary daily would be absolutley ludicrous! I hadn’t practiced Catholicism in decades and now I couldn’t imagine not doing it. It is like brushing my teeth! I have to do it because it fills me and my heart. It gives me the sense that I am doing something to better things, not just for me but for my family and the world. 

We are living in challenging times but I believe from the bottom of my heart that there is a reason. We are all going to be able to look back and say we got through it! It was hard but we did it and we learned. 

Life is so interesting and amazing! 

If life were always easy and we all just sat around and ate bon-bons it surely would be boring and uneventful! Some days I wish my life was uneventful but then I wouldn’t have the courage or knowledge to share from my heart. 

I want everyone to know that they aren’t alone. We all question and ask why; we all have something to handle and some things are easier to handle than others but you have to know that you are never alone and maybe even have some faith to know that this is making you stronger! 

You are amazing and you get to experience it! 

I hope you have a stupendous weekend! 

Have a happy, happy life and keep getting busy living sober. 

XO 

Elizabeth aka Bizzy 

Newsletter for May 10, 2024

It’s the Friday before Mother’s Day — does this bring up emotions for you? 

For me it totally does. My mother passed away 3 years ago and when she was alive it was hard. Why? Because we always had a strained relationship. I would venture to the card store and none of the sappy cards I felt were relevant to me and my mom. I never wanted to send something that wasn’t sincere. I wanted to send something to the effect that yes, I was happy that she gave birth to me and taught me manners and how to present myself, and how to act in any situation but I never felt like I could talk to her and know that she really loved me and wanted the best for me. As I write this it is making me sad. I always wanted those relationships with my Mom that they have portrayed in the movies. I wanted a Mom that loved me and never judged me but in reality that was not our relationship. 

Now that she is gone I have so much more of an appreciation for her. I miss her. 

Today I realize that she was the best Mom she could be for me. She gave me her best and me wishing and hoping that things were different is a waste of time and energy. 

One of the main takeaways from my visit to Medjugorje was that the Blessed Mother is there for me and all other humans living on Earth. She brings me joy and contentment. Since starting the rosary as one of my daily practices I have felt peace like never before. I don’t need to focus on the past; it is behind me. I can look back and learn but I cannot stare and wish for things to have been different. Emotions and feelings about a relationship that wasn’t what I ideally wanted does not bring me peace today, it makes me sad and frustrated. It was what it was….

Can you relate to this? 

Today being a Mom with a child that doesn’t speak to me is hard! I miss my child/adult everyday of my life. He hasn’t left my heart and strangely enough I am not mad. I am hurt. We are missing precious time that I know we are never going to get back. I respect him and his wishes and I ask in prayer that he can find forgiveness in his heart. 

When I think back to my relationship with my Mother I wish that I could have been more forgiving. I wish that I had taken my Mother as she was, not how I wanted her to be. 

We all put a lot of pressure on our loved ones — we want them to be how we want them to be! I hold them on a different level. In my heart I put them on a level that they should be and act a certain way instead of looking at them as human beings doing the best that they can. 

In all of my readings of late, which have been about the Blessed Mother, she talks about not judging others. I have spent years, decades judging others! It doesn't feel good! I know that it is wrong in my heart but I continue to label people as bad or good, when I should look at them as being who they are! Perfect! Each of us gets up in the morning and I think (maybe idyllically) that we all try and do our very best. We don’t wake up thinking who can hurt today! We need to have more compassion. 

As I mentioned my Mom is not here on Earth anymore and I miss her and I think it would be great if what I knew now I knew then. 

That is life, we learn, we reflect, we want to be better! We want to learn and search in our hearts how we can find peace and serenity. 

After I have searched and searched I have finally found my answer in God and the Blessed Mother. They help me find peace…I love today. I take time to listen to my heart. 

When I was in my active alcoholism I used alcohol to quell the pain and in the beginning of my recovery I put up a wall around my heart. I didn't want to let anyone in for fear of being hurt. After many relationships where I did let my wall down I was hurt countless times by others that I trusted but I can’t stay in a place where I stay closed. I can’t continue to work from a place of being on the defensive. I have to open…I have to be willing, I have to change. 

I know that I am on a new path and that I am open and that I want things to be different. I want to be different. With that being said, it takes work! I don’t mean hard manual labor work, I mean I have to get quiet, pray, breathe, trust. Open my heart.. And some days that is harder than others. 

My message to you all reading this is that I pray you find trust, know that you are not alone. Life is not a dress rehearsal, we are not going to be here forever, life isn't always going to be how it is today. Take the time to pray, get quiet, listen to what your insides are telling you! Not the negative but the positive. You Get to have this, you get to experience, You get to feel! Feelings aren’t facts, they are momentary reactions. Be kind to you and the ones around you. If you are feeling uncomfortable identify where that feeling is coming from and change it. 

If your Mom isn’t here anymore, if you have a strained relationship with your Mother or your child, if you are longing to be a Mom and you are not looking forward to Sunday May 12th, remember that it is just a day. Maybe use the day to reflect on the good times, the happy memories and know in your heart that next year it may be a completely different day for you! Have hope…

To all of the Moms out there, I wish you a Happy Mother’s Day! And to the women that aren’t Moms, have an amazing Sunday. 

Sundays are a day of rest so take care of yourself and your heart. Smile at someone, hold the door for someone, do something that will make another person happy. Joy is such a wonderful feeling and giving to others brings me the most joy. I remember when my children were young and I wanted things and feelings that I could control, if I could go back I would just let go and enjoy the moments. 

Have a wonderful weekend, enjoy life and the simple things because in the end it is the simple things that make us the most happy! 

Take care and until next week, keep getting busy living sober. 

Sending big hugs and love to you all. 

XO 

Elizabeth aka Bizzy 

Newsletter #14

I’m back!!! 

Three weeks away and I feel like a new person. I had no real expectations on what my trip was going to be…because of that, I was open to new experiences and let my fears, apprehensions, and possibilities go…

I wanted a new encounter. 

Life is so precious and valuable and we all let things get into our way. Thoughts, fears and our egos. 

I hear from people all of the time that need help and want to change but are stuck! They can’t get past the thought of, “what is everyone going to think of me?”, “how am I going to be judged by my peers”? Do we ever think about how we are going to be judged at the end of our life? How are our family going to view us? 

My personal experiences in the past were that I put strangers' views and opinions of me above my own feelings. I put a need to be accepted by the “right people” above doing the right, kind and loving actions. Can you relate to that? It is in all of the movies, and television shows. What lengths are you going to go to feel Cool? To feel like you are worthy? Are you willing to change your appearance so that you can change to fit the mold that society is screaming for you to look like? Do you have your own opinion or is the opinion of your friend that is popular more important than what you know in your heart to be right? Do you take the time to listen to your heart? 

The only reason that I can talk about these things is because I have experienced these traits personally. 

I let others' views of me or I should say what I thought others felt (now I know no one is really thinking about me at all) surpass what I knew in my heart was right for me. Getting sober was one of those stages in my life that I put what I thought others would think of me not drinking above what I knew was right at my core. At the end of the day it was about me and no one else….

On my trip to Medjorgia I felt like I was being judged, but now I know it was me judging me! But in the moment it was easier to put it on other people. 

Medjorgia is a place like no other that I had experienced before going. It was as if I went back in time. God and the Blessed Mother were everywhere. People were there searching for that feeling that we are OK! That God is alive and so is the Blessed Mother. We were there to have a feeling that has fallen away from society. The feeling is that we are not alone. That there is something bigger than us, that life isn’t about what you're wearing, or who your friends are. It is about being loving, kind and accepting of what graces you have. We are all individuals with amazing gifts and traits that are special. We are special. We are loved even though it may seem at times that we aren’t. I can tell you that indeed we are perfect! The exact way God made us. 

I don’t want to come off as a holy zealot, but I went on this pilgrimage not knowing why I was there to know exactly the reason. I am on a path/journey to help others to know that they are not alone. You are loved and you too can change if you just open your heart. If you let life happen, embrace who you see in the mirror. You are exactly where you are supposed to be. 

In the past 17 years I have searched, and searched for answers. Took a yoga teacher training, went to Kabbalah classes and then some looking for answers to why? Why am I here? What am I doing? Searching for things outside of myself when all of the time everything was inside of me. I have been given so many gifts, most importantly my sobriety and my relationship with God. I am OK! And I am here to tell you that you are OK! 

It is OK to rest, relax, and listen to your heart. 

When we are running all of the time it is hard to hear. Noise is everywhere and I have learned that when I get quiet and let the noise go, put down my phone, stop looking at social media, stop watching the news I can hear peace. 

I have always been searching for peace and serenity and until now I thought it was something I had to buy. A course, a coach, a therapist and today I know that if I just take time in the morning and pray, meditate, listen to the birds, peace and serenity appear and give me the ability to spend my day living in grace rather than fear. 

I hope you have a wonderful weekend and week and know that you are never alone. You can always reach out to me if you need a friend just to listen. 

You got this, I promise. 

Have a happy happy 

Love, 

Elizabeth aka Bizzy 

Newsletter #13

Happy Spring! 

Happy Easter to all my listeners that celebrate. I absolutely love this time of year! When I was living in the Northeast or Midwest this time of year was all about daffodils popping their heads and trees sprouting new growth. 

Spring is a time of rebirth. Everything is green and colorful after a long winter. Even if the groundhog says Spring is early, when it arrives it is such a happy time. No more gray cold days. 

I am reflecting on what I built 7 years ago, Busy Living Sober. Who knew that I would have started a podcast? Now this was before the “podcast”was a household name. When the lovely people at Zero to Five (marketing firm) suggested that I start a podcast, I asked, “what is a podcast and how do I do that?”. Needless to say as of today I have published 430 podcasts and it has been a lot of fun~! But….

430 episodes in. I am pondering if this is what I really want to do moving forward? 

The problem is I have really made a go of this and put a lot of time and effort into this passion of mine and it is not a money maker. In fact, it is more of a money taker LOL! Nevertheless, it isn’t only about the money — it is the questioning that I do constantly that is driving me nutty! Every so often I think to myself, “is this what I want to do?”, “is this the best use of my time?” and more often it is, “God, what do you want me to be doing with my life and the gifts that you have given me?” Do you ever feel like this? Like, “God, what do you want me to do?” If you do please reach out to me and let me know so I don’t feel so crazy, elizabeth@elizabethchance.com. 

I heard years ago that if you don’t know what to do, do nothing. 

So I am heading to Europe early in April and I will be gone most of the month and I am giving myself this time to sit and reflect and let go. I will be praying and hoping to hear answers as to where and what I should be doing in the future. 

It is Elizabeth 5.0 and it is time for me to really make a decision on whether or not I am going to continue my work as a podcaster or if it is time for me to pivot and change directions and get into something new….

You will not be receiving a Newsletter in the month of April and I will not be putting out new podcasts of me solo while I am away. I will still have guests on Mondays and some old episodes will fill in on Wednesdays. 

I am leaving my computer at home and I will be using a pen and paper while I am away (the old-fashioned way) to reflect and journal all of my adventures in Croatia, Bosnia, and Italy. 

This trip is going to be filled with spirituality, self reflection, and fun! 

Look for a Newsletter the first Friday in May and until then I wish you all the very best. 

Remember that you are never alone and that life is an adventure. Take it one day at a time and some days seconds at a time. 

Have a happy, happy 

See you all in May 

XO 

Elizabeth aka Bizzy 

Newsletter #12

Stress! 

How many of you feel stress? 

Psychology Today Defines Stress as: 

Stress generally refers to two things: the psychological perception of pressure, on the one hand, and the body's response to it, on the other, which involves multiple systems, from metabolism to muscles to memory.

Some stress is necessary for all living systems; it is the means by which they encounter and respond to the challenges and uncertainties of existence. The perception of danger sets off an automatic response system, known as the fight-or-flight response, that, activated through hormonal signals, prepares an animal to meet a threat or to flee from it.

In today’s world we allow things, people, places and things to stress us out. 

We want things to be perfect, we compare ourselves to others and how others look on the outside and strive for something that may be unattainable for whatever reason. 

Wanting to feel perfect leads to feelings of inadequacy which in turn make us sick. Striving for something that is almost impossible to attain can result in hopelessness  and unless you have tools to fix those feelings you will reach out for a drink or a drug. In my opinion. You want those things because they calm you. 

It is a known fact that we are a very stressed out society, the powers at be like that we feel out of control and lacking. Those feelings are what make us want to buy things, fill our hole inside of ourselves with material items, alcohol and drugs. It wants us to be sick!

If we take time to just stop, breathe and really look at what is going on that is causing our stress we can calm down. We can look at things rationally and know that all that needs to be done will get done. 

Getting back to basics is what has always helped me. I remember thinking ok, are my kids safe? Are they fed? Are they nice loving little people? Are they clean? 

That is all that really matters. 

Perfection is unattainable and knowing that you are doing your best and showing up as your best self is all that really matters. All your family wants is love and security, all the other material stuff is great but it won't make you happy or fulfilled. 

Love your life….relax…breathe…settle down and if you can stay off of social media it will not help you on your path to feeling less stress, I promise you!  Social media promotes stress so stay away especially if you are looking for some serenity. 

Have a wonderful weekend and a 

Happy, Happy 

Love, 

Elizabeth aka Bizzy

Newsletter #11

Do you ever just give up, throw in the towel? Say, “forget it, I’m done”, or do you preserve and keep going? 

Life is a journey…not a destination. A quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson is so apropos. 

When I was young, when all big dreams started, I wanted to be the next Barbara Walters (for those that don’t know who she is — she was the number one woman journalist for decades) but I started drinking at 13 and those dreams went to the wayside. But, I have never said, I give up, that's it! I am never getting my dream, I am too old, too set in my ways, not smart enough and the list of why I should give up is long. But, because I now know that life is a journey and not a destination I can keep trying. 

We all have dreams, some big and some small but, everyone that is breathing has some remembrance of being young and dreaming of what they wanted to be…

Unfortunately there are people in our lives that steer us away from reaching those goals because of that person's fears and inadequacies. 

I understand that growing up and wanting to be a professional athlete or a movie star is hard and it doesn’t happen to too many people but, what if you could still make a career out of playing the sport just at a lower level or acting in just your local theater? Would that be bad? It may not make you millions, but at the end of the day, is it all about the money or the experience? 

I have been watching a show on Netflix and then reading a book where the common theme is that the person that wants to be rich is always the one that is sad, unfulfilled at the end of his or her life or becomes addicted to drugs, alcohol, or sex, or all three. They are not fulfilled but the person that is living their life doing something that they dreamed of is happy, fulfilled, and at peace. 

One may be happy everyday but it seems as an observer that the person that has goals of achieving success in what they love are better off. 

We all have dreams and goals. Don't let the almighty dollar stand in the way of your aspirations. 

My opinion is that if we give up on our dreams and reach for the dollar, tragic things happen like drug addiction and alcoholism or worse complete and utter depression and sadness. 

I have never given up even though it hasn’t been easy but whoever said life was easy lied to you! 

You have one life (as far as I know). Why wouldn’t you reach for your personal stars?

I’m cheering you on! Don’t ever, ever give up on your dreams no matter how old or young you are! 

Have a happy happy 

Love, 

Elizabeth, Bizzy

Newsletter #10

Happy Friday!!! 

I don’t know if you had a chance to listen to episode 424 [link to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fw4uAjx9eho] this week where I talk about worrying, and God’s winks, but I have to say it resonated with a lot of people. Ironically — or maybe a God wink — I have heard from so many people today in one-on-one conversations that a lot of people are worried. Why is that? 

Another word people use for worry is anxiety. We are a society of anxious people. One of my guests on the show was Dr John Delony [link to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tt_gatZ6ow0] who makes a living coaching people via his book and podcast about how to have a non-anxious life. And is that working? 

Tucker Carlson made a fascinating comment on his interview with Lex Friedman last week that “Our society is so sick. People are still picking up and using drugs knowing that they are laced with deadly doses of fentanyl”. And, he is right! 

There is a famous TedTalk and study about rats. I am going to abbreviate the story but here’s the gist. Rats that lived in solitary worlds used cocaine and drugs a lot more than rats that lived with other rats and that had fun things to do with the other rats. The drugs were available to the rats that had a bunch of friends but the rats didn’t want it! Why? Because the rats were happy and fulfilled in relationships with other rats. 

How different are we from rats? In this article from Dec. 4, 2023 Conversation.com https://theconversation.com/rats-are-more-human-than-you-think-and-they-certainly-like-being-around-us-216846 we are more similar than one would think. So what if we tried hanging out with one another more often? Is it too late? 

Has AI already taken hold of society as we used to know it? I think we are not at the place where we can’t change this, I am optimistic and I think we can change. We can spend more time together socially. 

Thinking back over my 55 years on this planet I can honestly say that I am so happy when I am spending time with other people. It is something instinctual that I feel when I am around others. That is why family has been such a place of joy over the centuries. 

We all have theories of why our governments, the powers that be, want to keep us apart. Some believe in conspiracy theories and I respect whatever you want to believe but, I believe that we need more togetherness and less isolation. We need WE! 

No more sitting in your house watching the television, or gaming with friends on the internet. It is time to come together. Whether it be at the park, church, synagogue, mosque, mall, just somewhere other than your home. We need to come together because love at the end of the day beats sadness, loneliness and anxiety. 

Life isn’t about our outsides and materialism! It is about our insides! It is about our hearts, our brains, our breath. We need to learn to let the nagging inside voice that tells us that we aren’t good enough, pretty enough, smart enough to make new friends. Those are all lies! 

Take a chance this weekend, find a church, a group that interests you and find out when they meet and go! Go see, go take a chance. No more time for fear, it is time to come together. 

Please don’t let your fears or anxieties get in the way of your happiness. Try something new, and if you don’t like that keep trying! It may take some time to like the new group but don’t give up on your happiness, you are worth it. 

At the end of the day we will all feel fear/anxiety. It is part of the human make-up, but it doesn’t always have to take front and center. Think about it. If you were spending time with a bunch of friends you wouldn’t be spending a lot of time thinking about yourself. You would be listening and engaging in conversation, hopefully the conversation would be about a subject that interested you, hence why it is important to find a group that has similar interests to you. 

You can make new friends, I promise. 

Today my shirt says, “The Purpose of life is to be Happy” Dalai Lama

You got this! 

Have a happy, happy. 

Love, 

Elizabeth Chance aka Bizzy